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Nothing left to shift: fears grow over NHS paradigm supply


Blog headlines

  • Link of the week - Visionbridge
    31 July 2020

    The link we are sharing this week was submitted by Julian Jackson, Visionbridge.

  • Links of the week
    23 July 2020

    This week we are sharing two articles with you.

  • Link of the week
    21 July 2020

    The blog is from the perspective of the Company Chemist Association's Chief Executive Malcolm Harrison.

  • Link of the week
    9 July 2020

    This week we are sharing a blog from the NHS Confederation’s “NHS Reset” looking at the work of Healthwatch, the role of volunteers in supporting patients being discharged from hospital and the importance of the community.

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  • Guest blog:Karen Chumley
    25 June 2020

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  • Link of the week
    19 June 2020

    This week's link of the week is article by Yasmin Khanagha published in Nursing Times – Why we need to open the conversation about racism.

  • Guest blog: Dr Karen Chumbley
    12 June 2020

    This week we have a guest blog submitted by Dr Karen Chumbley, clinical director and deputy chief executive at St Helena (https://www.sthelena.org.uk/)

  • Social care to become lifestyle brand
    16 April 2020

    Social care is to get a new brand identity as the government seeks to reverse the perception that it is the poor relation of the NHS.

  • Blithering Covid-19 bulletin plays vital role
    2 April 2020

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  • Social distancing the Longstay way
    27 March 2020

    We asked Sir Trevor Longstay, chief executive of the NHS Blithering University Hospitals Foundation Trust and commander-in-chief of the Blithering Covid-19 Taskforce to give us some practical tips on social distancing. Here he shares some of the lessons learned over four decades of leadership – not all of them relevant or epidemiologically sound

  • Nothing left to shift: fears grow over NHS paradigm supply
    12 March 2020

    The government has issued a stark warning that stocks of paradigms and other basic supplies could soon run out if NHS managers continue panic-buying.

  • Matt Hancock’s diary – a week of levelling up
    27 February 2020

    Taking personal charge of global pandemics is one of the perks of this job. I’m referring to coronavirus, of course, and I’m booked to appear on Sky News to talk about it.

  • Exceeding your expectations: the Blithering staff survey
    20 February 2020

    Staff at NHS Blithering feel listened to “at least once a year” and report that their expectations of taking part in surveys have been “met” or “exceeded” in the past 12 months.

  • Martin Plackard’s week: Tuesday
    7 February 2020

    The second in our series of privileged insights to the working life of Martin Plackard, the NHS’s most gifted communicator

  • Martin Plackard’s week: Monday
    30 January 2020

    First in an occasional series of glimpses into a typical week in the life of Martin Plackard, the NHS's most influential strategic communicator

  • A quick guide to quick guides
    24 January 2020

    Few of us have time for long documents that take ages to read or a lot of expertise to put together. That’s where quick guides come in.

  • Towards people and impact
    17 January 2020

    This week the Royal Pharmaceutical Society advertised for a head of engagement and belonging. Such titles can be controversial – but not for Martin Plackard, whose CV features a number of leadership roles in the fields of impact, euphemism management and talent delivery.

  • National log-in reset will change everything
    9 January 2020

    This week the Department of Health and Social Care announced a £40m investment to make it easier to log-in to NHS computers. It’s a laudable aim, akin to fitting a keyless entry system to a Ford Anglia to make it go faster.

  • Martin Plackard’s top tips for making a difference in 2020
    3 January 2020

    NHS Blithering’s Martin Plackard MBE was recognised in the new year honours list for services to strategic communications and meaningful engagement. Here he gives his top tips for others who hope to make a very real difference to people, communities and their own career prospects in 2020.

Thursday, 12 March 2020

Nothing left to shift: fears grow over NHS paradigm supply

The government has issued a stark warning that stocks of paradigms and other basic supplies could soon run out if NHS managers continue panic-buying.

NHS leaders appealed for calm after managers worried about shortages rushed to stockpile theories, concepts and essential terminology for use in vital strategy documents.

In a wave of panic-buying reminiscent of the national initiatives famine of 2005, desperate managers stripped supermarket shelves of neologisms, hypotheses and colourful diagrams.

Tesco reported that shoppers were ignoring “one per customer” signs and filling their trolleys with new care models and transformation hyperbole “as if they were going out of fashion”.

Panic buy-in

Judy, a horizon-scanning manager at a national body, said: “I couldn’t believe it. I went to Asda hoping to pick up supplies for an accelerator programme and the shelves were bare. The only things left were a few packs of Vanguard Original and they were well past their sell-by date.”

Hassan, an impact and delivery manager for quick wins at a hospital trust, said: “It was chaos. I saw people fighting to get their hands on the last scraps of management jargon and one man was caught trying to make off with two assurance frameworks and a maturity matrix hidden inside his duffel coat.”

Clear blue water shortage

Reports are common of acronyms being traded for over-the-counter infographics and of management consultants selling second-hand ideas at vastly inflated prices in supermarket car parks.

Supermarket bosses said that they could no longer guarantee supplies of low-hanging fruit, bottled clear blue water and granular produce.

Experts said that the most vulnerable with no ideas of their own would be the first to suffer.

Royston Twix, emeritus professor of applied thought-leadership at one of the country’s foremost internet-based healthcare academies, said: “Stocks of old chestnuts are already dangerously low. What’s going to happen to emergent integrated care systems and nascent place-based collaboratives if we run out of platitudes?”

Editor: Julian Patterson


Anonymous says:
Mar 13, 2020 09:17 AM

Royston Twix - it's genius!

Anonymous says:
Mar 17, 2020 01:00 PM

The highlight of my working week!!